android dreams
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latest archive about email links yearbook japan photoblog wish list	Mon Dec 16 02 / 12:08 AM On Friday afternoon, after forcing my body to sleep for 20 hours due to half-formed feelings of depression and exhaustion, I woke up in an altered state. My heart was jackrabbiting in heavy shoes, racing, pounding, shrieking. I was weak, dizzy, shaky - all I could do was lie in bed while my body mistakenly tried to make me do anything but. I could make it ten feet out of bed before I'd have to lie down on the floor. After two hours of thinking over all the times I'd marvelled at how the heart keeps beating every second of every day of every year, I threw up violently. I fell back asleep for another three hours and woke up refreshed, an entire 24 hours lost to nothing. I entertained not-so-serious serious thoughts about my own death during the time my heart was out of control. I came to this conclusion: death is not scary, indeed I wished for sleep - but, however surprising, I do not want to go yet.
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Lisa Higgs
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