astronaut ambition

Unsent Letter #5 (the end)

.

latest
archive
about
email
links

yearbook

japan
photoblog

wish list
Fri Aug 31 01 / 6:54 AM

It’s now 10:30pm on that same Friday. I’m two hours in your future, Ashley. Being on this side of the world with you, and writing letters again, reminds me that you really are my closest friend.

Damn, I miss you. I miss everybody, but somehow they feel closer even though they are farther – perhaps because I will be seeing them in a definite amount of time. But you, Ashley, are the closest one yet, but seem the furthest away in space and time.

Traveling so far makes me think of all the people in this world. No matter where you go, you will only come across more people. I have not even tried to make friends here because I will never see them again. I never emailed Tamara G. from the plane, even though we had so many things in common in the first ten minutes it was fascinating. Then again, she didn’t email me either. Another way we’re very much alike, I see.

I don’t feel anything towards these Aussies. They have a lovely country so far, although I wish they had clothes dryers. Being in another country like this for a long time is such a profound feeling. It’s like being lost when you know exactly where you are. It’s like floating peacefully in a calm ocean without the shoreline in sight. It’s like being in a crowded room where everybody knows each other, except you. It feels like there is nobody to react against, and are you really there if nobody knows you are? I feel like I am not making an impression.

I guess I should be content to let something else make the impression on me. For the first year or so of a baby’s life, it doesn’t realize that there is anything else in the world besides itself; it has no differentiation between me and other. But that feeling sticks with some people longer than others. Australia is making me realize that the world is bigger than I thought, and that there are people who have no interest in my lifestyle.

But in the big picture, what we are doing is amazing. Maybe we feel we are wasting a year in misery, but later we can look back and say, "When I was young I spent a year in another country." So here’s to being on the other side of the world, to living in a culture we’d only ever seen in the movies, to plane rides and International Date Lines, to experiences we can only get here, to a home that will seem different when we return – but we will be the ones that have changed.

Vive la difference!

</>

Lisa Higgs

.

*Unsent Letter #5 (the end)*
.
latest archive about email links yearbook japan photoblog wish list	Fri Aug 31 01 / 6:54 AM It’s now 10:30pm on that same Friday. I’m two hours in your future, Ashley. Being on this side of the world with you, and writing letters again, reminds me that you really are my closest friend. Damn, I miss you. I miss everybody, but somehow they feel closer even though they are farther – perhaps because I will be seeing them in a definite amount of time. But you, Ashley, are the closest one yet, but seem the furthest away in space and time. Traveling so far makes me think of all the people in this world. No matter where you go, you will only come across more people. I have not even tried to make friends here because I will never see them again. I never emailed Tamara G. from the plane, even though we had so many things in common in the first ten minutes it was fascinating. Then again, she didn’t email me either. Another way we’re very much alike, I see. I don’t feel anything towards these Aussies. They have a lovely country so far, although I wish they had clothes dryers. Being in another country like this for a long time is such a profound feeling. It’s like being lost when you know exactly where you are. It’s like floating peacefully in a calm ocean without the shoreline in sight. It’s like being in a crowded room where everybody knows each other, except you. It feels like there is nobody to react against, and are you really there if nobody knows you are? I feel like I am not making an impression. I guess I should be content to let something else make the impression on me. For the first year or so of a baby’s life, it doesn’t realize that there is anything else in the world besides itself; it has no differentiation between me and other. But that feeling sticks with some people longer than others. Australia is making me realize that the world is bigger than I thought, and that there are people who have no interest in my lifestyle. But in the big picture, what we are doing is amazing. Maybe we feel we are wasting a year in misery, but later we can look back and say, "When I was young I spent a year in another country." So here’s to being on the other side of the world, to living in a culture we’d only ever seen in the movies, to plane rides and International Date Lines, to experiences we can only get here, to a home that will seem different when we return – but we will be the ones that have changed. Vive la difference!
	</>
Lisa Higgs
.